Thursday, May 10, 2012

Body Image

I clicked on a link a friend had posted on FB about young girls' body images being influenced by fake air-brushed girls in magazines. And something inside my memory opened and released this long-suppressed memory of me being about 8 or 9 years old and, after being told on a daily basis by my brother that I was fat, I finally snapped and yelled at the top of my lungs "I'm fat and I need ultra slim fast!" It makes sense to trace back my current body image issues to when I was a kid. I don't think my parents stopped my brother, well, 1. Because he ruled the house and they were kind of afraid of him, too, and 2. I don't think they knew that he was permanently damaging me. But I wish they had. I wish someone had stuck up for me and told me I was not fat (because I really wasn't-- I was a normal-weight kid who turned into an anorexic pre-teen who turned into an obsessive adult). And even now, I need constant reinforcement concerning my weight and appearance. At least now, I'm smart enough to know the answer isn't Ultra Slim Fast. Do they even make that anymore?